V4 - mega surprise

V4 was my toughest decision so far.  I wanted to make sure that we experienced a large church, geared toward an unchurched/dechurched audience.  I relied exclusively on web presences (web site, facebook) to locate this church, from among several who would fit the basic description.  This particular church has several campuses in the metro area, including an "online" campus.  We chose a physical location, rather than a virtual one.  This location had four different Sunday service times to choose from (including a 5:30 PM option) - we chose 12:00 (Noon). 

There was a line of traffic entering/exiting the parking area when we arrive a few minutes before the service was to begin.  The parking lot staff and greeters provided a very efficient and friendly experience from the time we entered the parking lot until we reached the front door.  Unlike our experience at V1, we had no trouble feeling like we belonged here, and that we were part of some exciting event about to take place. 

The V4 church meets in what must have been a warehouse - the lobby and auditorium spaces were basic, functional and had very high ceilings.  There was floor seating and stadium-style seating areas.  The music was loud, but very professional.  The songs were familiar ones to us.

The most surprising thing to us was the use of video in the service.  Of course, the whole service is being projected live from two cameras.  At first, it was a little distracting for me (a little too much metro-worship leader for my taste - see http://www.jonacuff.com/stuffchristianslike/2008/06/269-understanding-how-metrosexual-your-worship-leader-is-a-handy-guide/).  However, during the message the speaker had a large, flat-screen monitor on a wheeled stand beside him and he interacted with it (reading scripture, key points, etc.) and it really worked.  It made me feel less conscious about the video, and seemed to blur the line between the live and the virtual all being in the same space.  This probably sounds kooky, but I know what I saw (or at least I think I know...). 

No communion - that was a bummer.  I know the logistics of bread and wine for thousands in a highly scripted, tightly scheduled event would be daunting, but without it I felt like I was missing something.  If Jesus could figure out 5000 men (plus women/children) in the wilderness - I'm sure his tech savvy, modern day church could figure out a little bread and juice to remember Him by.  I suspect that V4 is a generically named by-product of a traditional denomination that is not in the habit of observing the Lord's Supper on a weekly basis.  I insert here a shameless plug for the Sacrament of Communion and think that it has more to offer church goers in this post-modern era than almost anything else we can do together on a Sunday morning.  (I sense a follow up post coming on this topic)

Look for another follow up post on the overwhelmingly popular topic of Nashville churches in August - serving.  For the last three weeks it is all we have heard about, in three different places.  We have heard the good, bad and ugly on serving - and have a few observations to share. 

The surprise of the mega church experience was how easy it was to feel welcomed and accepted.  There was a sense of energy and excitement to be a part of a large crowd worshipping, listening and praying together.  The general demographic was young (younger than us at any rate), seriously - really young.  We found this encouraging.  The message of grace, of acceptance, of service and sacrifice was delivered in an engaging and challenging way to a younger generation of believers, seekers and skeptics all in one place.  There was a real sense of "belonging", that resonated with us.  It was a good place to be on this Sunday.

Visit 3 - evening church

V3 (going forward each week's experience will be referred to with a "V" and the week number) took us to a different part of town, at a different time of day.  We found V3 church through a drive by.  Rachel and Bethany were out shopping and saw a vinyl sign at a large, traditional church building - advertising a church meeting there with a hip, artistic feel.  A web search shed a little more light on this church and we decided to make a visit.  It felt a little weird to wait until the evening to attend church, but there was something positive about wrapping up a weekend with a time of worship and fellowship.  I know this is something we have discussed at Discovery as an alternative time, and we have already noticed several churches in Nashville using this time slot.  From our limited experience, it is worth considering. 

We arrived a few minutes early for V3 and followed signs to the location in the church building where the service was taking place.  The church had done a nice job of transforming a gym/fellowship area space into a "holy place" with pipe and drape and lighting.  Our experience in transforming spaces gave us a real appreciation for the work and thought put into this.  It totally worked.  We were greeted briefly by a few different people, but the initial greetings were somewhat subdued, in keeping with a more contemplative atmosphere. 

Once again, the Music City lived up to expectations with another very talented worship band.  This group featured a guest musician and songwriter who had composed some music that V3 church uses regularly in their services. The musical selections provided a nice balance of upbeat and reflective songs.  We were greeted by a staff member from the stage, offering the Peace of Christ.  This was followed by a moment where we were instructed to greet others around us with the Peace of Christ. 

The message that followed was brought by one of the staff members and was a homily on the episode in the life of Jesus where he washed the disciples feet.  The emphasis was on Christ's expression of love through this humble act of service.  The challenge to the listener was to find ways to express the love of Christ through service in local and global community.  It was a sharp contrast in tone, content and "grace factor" to the messages delivered in V1 and V2 churches.  Maybe (borderline) too polite. 

At the conclusion, the service transitioned to a time of communion, which included an opportunity to wash one another's hands (you thought it was going to be feet, didn't you?).  The moment hit us hard because after two weeks of quick-pass "chicklet" communion experiences, V3 does it right (meaning, of course, intinction - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intinction).  The tears in our eyes were part gratitude for Christ's incredible gift, and part homesickness for Discovery. 

When the service dismissed we were greeted by several people, including several staff members.  They welcomed us to the area warmly, and were passionate about their church.  There was another new couple who sat directly behind us - young, professional-looking.  I spoke to them during the "Peace of Christ" moment, and found out they had recently relocated from Texas.  They left quickly after the service, and looked a little uncomfortable or overwhelmed.  (I am planning a follow up post on the topic of greeting people who look uncomfortable.)  We left feeling renewed by having been there - not a bad way to wrap up a weekend.      

Visit 2 - Could not be more different...

After Visit 1, we were anxious to see if that experience would be the norm, or if our following church visits would be better or worse... 

Visit 2 started with another overflowing parking lot.  This church’s facility was much smaller and every space near the entrance was parked up.  We found a spot in a parking area in back of the building, and walked toward the front.  I know that we had many conversations at Discovery over the years about the fact that visitors tend to arrive early, and that staff, leadership and key volunteers should park further away so that we leave premium spots near the building for guests.  Our experiences so far have confirmed that visitors do arrive early, and that they are uncomfortable when they have to figure out where to park. 

Unlike Visit 1, we were greeted warmly and efficiently by a woman at the door.  We quickly had an explanation of what was happening that morning, and were asked to fill out a card.  We will accumulate more data points to evaluate, but my hunch is that this is the optimal greeter profile –  a woman “in the know” (i.e.- staff member or key volunteer highly vested in the church). 

Another observation – people visit churches in the summer. In fact, there may be a higher percentage of visitors in the summer months because that is a common season for people to be in transition.  We heard apologies today for some programming not being in session because “we take a little break during the summer”.  I can remember offering the same apologies to people during summer months at Discovery. I don’t think visitors mind that things are scaled back in summer, but it was uncomfortable to hear someone apologize for it.  Avoid apologizing.  Giving volunteers a “well-deserved break” is understandable, even admirable in a world that is increasingly interested in work/life/balance issues.  Have a clear plan and time frame for “regularly scheduled” programming to resume (i.e. make the well-deserved break appear strategic and not the collapse of all volunteer programs).  Invite visitors to return and experience the full spectrum of ministry the church is offering.

The band kicked off with a tight cover of Mister Mister’s “Kyrie”.  (Got my attention)   It looked and sounded like a .38 Special reunion tour (also had my attention thinking – “looks like a bunch of old guys up there”, until I realized I would fit right in the age demographic), playing hits from yesterday and today.  The sermon was truncated due to the ministry fair activities.  The text was John 3.  There was a strong application regarding personal evangelism and salvation.  The service closed with communion.  For a second week in a row we had to figure out the protocol – pass and take?  Pass and hold?  What do you do with the cup?  This time we were sitting close to the front and had fewer people to watch and see how they did it.  The communion service was “presided over” by a church leader with scripture read and prayer offered.

We met the pastor (no parlor at this church). After the service he sought us out and greeted us warmly.  He promised a follow up email; however, we did not provide an email address on the card we filled out.  We did receive a “welcome letter” mid week. 

The biggest distinction between Visit 1 and Visit 2 was size.  Visit 1 church was larger, and it was easier for us to move undetected.  Visit 2 church was smaller, and our presence was obvious.  People were excited to have visitors, and were even somewhat disappointed that we were already churched.   In fact, our greeter got a bit nervous when she found out we were from a Christian Church background.  More apologies followed – none were necessary. 

More to come on Bethany’s visit to the youth group meeting, Friend Day “contract”, and "over-emphasis" on the written word.  

Friendly Contract. Oxymoron?

Visit 2 Church is planning a “Friend Day” event as part of their fall kick off.  Apparently this is an annual event, and the pastor spent a good bit of time promoting the Friend Day during the service.  During the promotion, he explained that this year’s event would have a new feature – a Friend “Contract”.  The church was going to provide all of the members/regular attenders with copies of this contract that were to be used to sign people up to attend the Friend Day service.  It was described as a tool you could use to get commitments from friends, co-workers, family members, etc.  that they will promise to attend Friend Day at Visit 2 church. 

Our initial reaction was that we must have misunderstood what the “contract” was for.  The explanation continued and left no doubt – the signed contracts would be posted at the church prior to, and in preparation for, Friend Day.  We found this really troubling; especially in light of the comment made to us that visit 2 church really wants to reach “unchurched” people. 

Friend Day is certainly not a new idea, the origins can be traced to the ministry of Jesus, as people he encountered enthusiastically wanted to introduce their friends to Him.  In the 1980’s an author named Elmer Towns created a Friend Day program and offered the idea, complete with resource kit, for local churches to use.  A quick visit to Church Growth Institute’s website (www.churchgrowth.org) provided a sample of a “Friendly Contract”.   (To illustrate the “cutting edge” nature of this program - the material was last updated in 1994, to provide it on CD’s instead of audio cassette tapes and printed documents). 

The basic problem here is the word “contract” does not seem friendly, or imply friendship.  In John 1, there is no mention of Andrew or Philip utilizing a friend contract to get Simon or Nathaniel introduced to Jesus.  The contract appears to be a tool, in this setting, to provide accountability for church members to participate - a way to quantify buy-in on the evangelistic premise of Friend Day.  More Friend Contracts on display equals more people who take the growth of the church and the kingdom seriously.   It seems that we could find a better way to measure “buy-in”. 

At Discovery, we have historically attempted to accomplish this through the use of stories, as opposed to over-reliance on statistical measures. Providing opportunities for people to share the stories of friends invited, even the ones that do not come (who would never sign a contract).  Part of the reason for evangelistic initiatives is for the growth of the inviters – not just the assimilation of the invitees.  I am sure that Philip shared the story of Nathanial’s first encounter with Jesus many times over – we know that John did.

Visit 2b - the youth group experience

Guest Blogger Bethany Morris describes her experience at Visit 2 Church's youth group meeting...

Not only did I spend this Sunday morning in church I spent this evening at the youth group. The youth pastor invited me after the service to go to their evening study. Since there were 2 other soon-to-be-college freshmen there I would not be completely out of my age range. 

When I arrived I saw the youth pastor and he said the other students were just arriving.  He showed me the space then introduced me, by name, to the other students. I was glad that I was remembered and I knew that if I were a regular attender I would be very well cared for. There were a few minutes while everyone arrived that everyone talked, or tossed a ball. I sat in a chair and quietly observed the activity. There were about 4 groups of 3-4 people each that talked or played amongst themselves. The middle schoolers hung out with one of the new college freshman, and other middle schoolers and the lower and upperclassmen seemed to have their own little discussions.

Of course, the rule that the new comer always has to be hit or injured when coming to a youth meeting for the first time, held true as I was bonked on the head by a rouge ball (I will have to beware of that rule if I get invited to any more youth services I would rather not have different shades of black and blue for each week I go somewhere new).

The games began. (If you don't want to hear about new youth games you can skip over this paragraph.)  We played a ball catching game where you had to clap before catching the ball that was thrown at you at random. I noticed the youth pastor held back on me a little and only threw the ball at me a few times to make me feel more comfortable. This was followed by a clever game where we had to open a box entirely covered in duct tape with oven mitts on. The box was passed around the circle and we each savagely clawed the box with pretty useless padded fingers to try to get the prize inside (no throwing, punching or smashing allowed). Then we played a game of kings ball (not sure I’ve remembered the name correctly) which was like 4 square with 9 people. After that came “rock, paper, scissors” mixed with evolution where we started as an egg then evolved when we won rock paper scissors 2 out of 3 times with a partner. Then we evolved to a chicken, but when you lost you devolved to an egg - or up to a dinosaur. After you won dinosaur without devolving to a chicken or even egg again you joined the winners. The games took up a lot of the time that could have spent teaching but I really enjoyed unwinding from this week and being able to laugh at people's dinosaur impressions as we stomped around the room (I am convinced mine was the best). 

The lesson was teaching us how to prove that Jesus was the son of God without using the Bible. The pastor apologized to me saying that it wasn't a typical lesson, but I loved it. It was thought provoking and compelling to listen to as well as extremely useful for me personally. We even got to talk about how humans cannot perceive infinity and God is infinity. 

I have very few things to critique about my experience, but a few things I noticed were:

 1. There was no set student leader in the group which could be either extremely good or extremely bad.  There was no favoritism and everything seemed to be very equal and harmonious. Yes there were little clicks but nothing screamed conflict from those differences. The youth group seemed healthy as a whole. However, as a new person I was not sure who to talk to sit with or interact with because no one was pointed out to me as someone I could hang out with for the night until I could get things figured out for if I come back.

2. The group did not know what to do with a new person. I could tell from the moment I saw the other students that someone new was not a regular occurrence. They waved at me but no one told me their names or anything about themselves unless if I shared first. They interacted with me in games fine and they were friendly but they still didn't know how I fit in. I was the extra piece of their finely oiled and routinely running machine that they just didn't know what to do with or what I was supposed to do. I can't really blame them for this fact though, with a group of 15 students on a good day, where you know everyone and at least a little about them, it's hard when someone new is introduced into that setting. However, it is harder being the outsider with 13 people that you know nothing about in a new environment and no knowledge of how things run.

Overall it was a positive experience and I would definitely consider going back if I got the chance. 

After Visit #1...Blogger's remorse

After some positive feedback on the Visit 1 post, we decided to try a mid-week follow up post to capture some of our thoughts as we reflected on the experience.

The level of detail we shared may have been a little overwhelming.  It was like we wanted all of our friends to be right there and experience this with us (which would have been really nice).  However, the order of service is a fairly standard formula in both the tradition of the Christian Churches, and especially in the contemporary/relevant church  (see contemprovant video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RJBd8zE48A).  So consider that the baseline, and from now on we will only post significant deviations.  This will give more space to observations about cultural nuances, exceeded expectations, warm welcomes and humorous anecdotes.

One thing we did see in visit#1 was a population of people with developmental disabilities that were brought to the service, with nursing assistants to assist them.  We applaud the effort to reach out and serve this population.  It was interesting that the entire group (probably from a group home setting) was lined up against the back wall (in a dedicated handicapped seating area) of the auditorium during the entire service.  It was not clear that there was any assistance provided to the group members to comprehend the service and message.  The group members appeared to be quickly moved out of the auditorium after the service.  Without any information about the specifics of the ministry provided to this population of adults, it is dangerous to draw too many conclusions.  However, as a first impression it communicated a contradictory message about the value of these people, and an "arm's length" approach to integrating them into the community and providing for their growth in the faith.  It begs the question, how are we (the Church) providing programming that maximizes learning (i.e. sitting through a 45 minute message?) and community within the local church for people with different physical/cognitive abilities.  At one point in the message (the reproductive rights soapbox moment) the preacher drove home the point that we all bear the image of God.  It is convicting to think that when we visualize human being made in the image of God, are we inclusive of the those who would be categorized as having "disabilities"?

By the way, we also found it odd that the auditorium emptied out "en mass" during the closing song.   We will track this disturbing trend on other visits to see if Tennesseans are so inoculated to live music that they are given to rudeness.

Another side note - after years of working with staff and leadership to continually find new ways to try and get new people to give us their contact information - there was no attempt at all during visit#1.  No tear off, no greet your neighbor moment, no appeal to sign up for our newsletter, no welcome table in the lobby - nothing.  They were advertising a Visit 1 church "101" class (bulletin, slide and preacher announcement) so there must have been somewhere to sign up for that, but we did not see it.  I suspect a bit of southern Calvanist theology at work here - If we were meant to join that church, God would not have let us out of there before someone had signed us up for the 101.

One last thing, then we will let Visit 1 fade into the background.  There was a retractable queue line (think banks or airport security) in the lobby, directly parallel to the path to enter the auditorium.  It did not wind back and forth, like queue barriers that keep people in check when they are trying to get to somewhere they want to go.  It just went straight down the middle of the corridor, like there were two sides that you could approach the sanctuary from.  There was no signage or instruction, just the web of nylon fabric that seemed to require you to know which side you should be on.  Was it to keep in bound traffic separate from out bound?  Was it to keep the rabble from entering with the VIPs?  It was weird.   I am sure it served some very practical purpose that I was not able to comprehend, but it just seemed odd. It made me think, are there things that we place in the path of people coming to church, coming to God.  They may be obviously practical to us because we understand why they are there - we know the history and the purpose.  Do we consider what these "barriers" look like to an outsider, to the person who is in a rush to find God, find community and finds something weird or odd in their way.  It reminds me of Acts 15.  It reminds me that we ought not be in the business of barrier placing.

Visit #1

Today was visit number one.

Admittedly, it was hard to get motivated for this.  The past week has been a whirlwind of goodbyes, packing, loading, driving, unloading and unpacking.  We have experienced the double whammy of physical exertion and emotional exhaustion.  However, a commitment to dear friends helped to motivate us to make our initial visit on our first Sunday in Middle Tennessee.

I thought it would be appropriate to establish a few ground rules for blogging this experience.  They are:

1. Stay Positive - this is not an attempt to belittle or undermine the ministries represented by the churches visited.  It is not our place to judge so quickly when we know so little about the people and story of these local expressions of God's Kingdom.  The objective is to report our experiences honestly and candidly, but without malice.  The churches visited will remain anonymous, and names will be withheld to protect the innocent.  (Allowances must be made for sarcastic wit on occasion, however)
2. Keep Perspective - the tremendous challenge that faces every church on any given Sunday is to honor God, minister to the needy, challenge the complacent, shore up the struggling, provide familiarity to the faithful and impress a newcomer - all in 60 - 90 minutes of carefully guarded time.  It is not all about us.
3. Learn Something - the quest to find a local church to serve and grow with is not the only reason for attending.  We will aspire to learn and grow in the process.  The assumption here is that God will teach us through this experience.  

Visit #1 - 

I chose a church to visit based on a Google search for Christian Churches, Nashville.  I selected a prominently listed site and made an initial assessment based on the content of the home page of the site.  Service Times were listed, but not obviously.  What was apparent was that the website was primarily designed for internal users.  I noted (with some dismay) that our visit would coincide with the start of a 31 week series of messages based on a book entitled "The Story".  We elected to attend the 10:30 service offering. 

The church property was clearly visible from a major street, and we navigated into the parking lot easily.  However, the lot was very full and the flow of traffic was not readily apparent.  I remarked about the need for a parking lot team (exact wording withheld in the spirit of rule #1), and thought immediately of our friend Chris Cuilla with new found appreciation for the parking ministry.  Maybe when we find a church I will volunteer for their parking lot team - or start one if they do not have one.

Once we located a spot - far from the building - which allowed us extra time to survey the arriving crowd and walk off some of the extra pounds we have gained from eating out too much during our move.  We agreed that we would not drop any names, or mention our distinguished pedigree as church planters, or hint at church leadership experience in our past (as if this would really matter to anyone - refer to rule #2).  We wished to be treated just like the ordinary visitor.   

The highlight of Visit #1 occurred after we entered the building.  After running the gauntlet of greeters at the main entrance, we wandered around the lobby admiring the facility.  A gentleman named John (name not changed because John deserves full recognition, and because it is a common name) introduced himself, asked our names, and welcomed us to the church.  He explained that we were early (the 9:00 service had not yet let out at this point - a grim portent that church services tend to run longer in this part of the country).  John told us a little about the church, asked us if we were new to the area, and what had brought us to Tennessee.  He politely excused himself since he needed to go and prepare the communion for the 10:30 service.  

When the 9:30 service let out, we filed into the auditorium.   We were all handed traditional bulletins, folded pieces of paper with information about the service and the church printed on them.  The bulletin contained three inserts -an advertisement for a newly formed "singles" group; a "fill-in-the-blank" style outline for taking notes during the message; and a flyer for Church Development Fund (CDF).  In a cruel twist of divine irony, we happened to visit on CDF Sunday.  

After locating some seats near the middle of the room, a lady seated at the other end of our row came over and spoke to Rachel.  Her greeting was brief, and her primary objective was to make sure we did not take any of the seats that she was saving for her family, who had not arrived yet.  We moved over one seat to make sure we did not encroach on that family's space.  

This church meets in a renovated retail space, and the space seemed to work well for them.  Sound, lighting, video and music were professional quality and enhanced the overall experience.  The band was tight, and consisted of a "lead singer" worship leader.  (I am not sure if he was actually a worship leader or a lead worshiper - I just know that he had no instrument in his hands, only a microphone).  The set was four songs, a short verbal interlude by the guitarless leader transitioned between a couple of the numbers.  We recognized most of the numbers and felt comfortable singing and experiencing the musical expressions of worship together.  

Communion followed the singing, with "tithes and offerings" collected after the communion elements had been passed.  An Elder presided over both of these activities with some brief words and prayers.  

After this came the message.  Week one of "The Story" covered the first nine chapters of Genesis - an ambitious undertaking to be sure.  The pastor took the opportunities presented by the text to address several "hot button" issues; including creationism/evolution, abortion, the sanctity of marriage and the roles of men/women with regard to spiritual leadership.  The positions he endorsed were predictable, but one could sense a level of compassion in their delivery.  At a point near the end of the message the pastor introduced a video segment (about 6 mins in length).  The video was a powerful element in the context of the message. YouTube link is:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f1Z9No9TPHM (we highly recommend viewing)

The sermon concluded with an invitation for people to come forward and profess a decision for Christ during a closing song.  There were a couple of responses, and it is clear that this is a growing church with a diverse group of people ministering and receiving ministry together.  One of the people coming forward placed their membership with the church.  The pastor welcomed this person to the family, and invited everyone to the "Pastor's Parlor" after the service to welcome this new member.  Interestingly, the second individual who rededicated her life to Christ, was not invited to the Pastor's Parlor.  

We filed out after the closing song and were greeted again by John.  He asked us if we wanted to meet the pastor, and we chose to decline.  Although the temptation to experience the Pastor's Parlor was strong.  We made our way out to the parking lot wondering what we had just passed up.  

Visit #1 left a couple of impressions.  We came away admiring a church for choosing a location and a ministry that places them in the midst of under-resourced people.  We also appreciated the effort made by John to speak with us and welcome us.  We realize it has been a long time since we were faced with the prospect of "joining" a church that we have little or no influence in shaping, and that is a humbling and terrifying feeling.  This church may be the best one we will visit, and yet there was little compulsion to walk the aisle and place our membership (although getting into the Parlor could be a factor).  We will see what next Sunday's experience brings.